I had never had surgery before. Since I was someone who hated both hospitals and pain, I figured that I would be able to avoid it for a good long time. If someone had told me that I would have willingly signed up for surgery even five years ago, I'd have laughed at you.
If you have had surgery before, maybe some of this will sound familiar to you -if not, please know that I am not trying to scare you, this is just my story. The stories of others will be different. In fact, the story of my friend, R. *is* different, but I will let her share it if she ever chooses to do so.
The night before surgery, you have to take Milk of Magnesia. I had never taken this stuff before, and I wasn't sure what to think about it. My advice to you is to stay home and stay as close to a bathroom as you possibly can. DO NOT go out. Just don't. lol
The next morning, my surgery was scheduled for 9:30, so I had to be there at 6:30. My dad was kind enough to take me, which I appreciated...and I was still feeling the effects of that damn Milk of Magnesia. Once I was all checked in, they moved me into the pre-surgery area, where I had my blood pressure and whatnot taken. I was actually very calm, which the nurses noted when they saw that my blood pressure was pretty much normal. They took my clothes and gave me my gown and I sat around with my parents (Mom isn't a morning person and got there a bit later..lol) for a couple of hours until I got wheeled away to surgery.
I will tell you this - I was even more convinced it was the right decision for me when I was so calm all morning and the night before. I was TERRIFIED of surgery. I was terrified of an upper endoscopy, and that was just putting a tube down my throat -here they were going to cut off part of my stomach! But you know what? That whole day, the nurses kept saying that they couldn't believe how calm I was. Sometimes, your soul just knows and puts you at ease.
On my way there, my mom was scared. I know she was crying and she was freaked out. I kept telling her to relax. I got into the OR waiting area, and I met my nurses, anesthesiologist, and saw my surgeon, Dr. Pham. Everyone was so nice, and Dr. Pham held my hand and told me that everything would be okay. I really cannot say enough about him or the staff that day - the second they knew I was feeling nervous, they arranged for me to get some medication, and then I just waited for the big moment.
As they were wheeling me into the OR, I kept joking that I was planning on running, but now it was too late. One of the nurses said 'Well, if you jump before this next corner, you have a chance.' LOL I appreciated her joining in. :) The OR didn't look anything like I expected. I guess I didn't know what to expect since all of the ORs I had ever seen were on television, so there you have it. They don't look like what they show on TV. They aren't sexy, sleek, stainless steel fashionable places. This one was kind of a green and metal color. They had me move onto the operating table, and talked to me for a minute as they were administering the anesthesia. I remember looking up at the light shining down on me, and then I was out.
When I woke up...oh man, I was in pain. They pump gas into your stomach so they can work easier, and that, mixed with the fact that my insides had just been trimmed down to size, hurt a lot. The nurses in the post-surgery area weren't the nicest - they tried to get me medication and help me to feel better, but nothing was helping. I have no idea why. Then, they further freaked me out by talking to each other and saying things like 'Have you ever seen someone be in this much pain after that surgery?' and the other one said that she hadn't. And then they were thinking that something must be wrong. Let me tell you something -some people are just more sensitive to pain than even they realize. If you are in health care, please try to be sensitive. I was really scared in that moment, thinking that something might be wrong, and I could barely respond to anything because of the anesthesia clouding my brain and my body. It was a really difficult hour or so that I sat in there in pain.
I was still in pain when I was wheeled back to my room. My parents met me somewhere along the way, and they could also see that I was in a lot of pain. Needless to say, this was not very soothing for my mother who is neurotic. lol They got me into my room, and it was in the middle of shift change, so while I saw the PA, and she ordered me meds, there was no one to get it. It wasn't until about an hour of my lying in the bed, moaning in pain, trying to get some relief, that Dr. Pham came in and heard what was happening and made sure someone got me medicine RIGHT AWAY. Have I mentioned how much I love Dr. Pham yet? :)
Once I had medicine...dilaudid, to be specific, I felt SO much better. According to my mom, the color returned to my face and I started to look more normal. I felt more normal, too. I was sitting up and talking to my parents and the nurses, and I was just generally happy to not be in pain. And, a funny thing happened...I WASN'T hungry. This probably sounds crazy to you guys, like...'Oh, of course you're not hungry, you just had surgery!'... But, to be honest, I had been ravenously hungry every day for as long as I could remember. It was such a huge relief to wake up and NOT feel that. It was different, too. I mean, it was like everything was finally quiet and still.
I also got a ton of anti-nausea medication. The anesthesia did a number of me, and I didn't want to drink anything. Right after surgery, all you are allowed to do is drink. I was given ice chips and water, apple juice, and cranberry juice, and all I could do is sip them. They're also determined that you do not get dehydrated, so they make you drink quite a bit...and right afterwards, the LAST thing you want to do is drink something, nevermind if you're nauseous. I dutifully sipped and watched TV, but it was so lonely when everyone went home for the night. I wished they would have stayed longer just so I had company.
All though the first night, I was woken up periodically to get pain meds, which was FINE with me. lol Then, at like, 5am, someone came in to take blood. Oh, that was so miserable. I just wanted to sleep, and this woman wanted to poke my veins. Bitch. lol I know she was just doing her job, but was 5am REALLY necessary?! UGH!! Anyway, the next morning, Dr. Pham came in to check on me and my incisions, and I got permission to have some extra food like hot chicken broth and tea. And, I could finally get up and walk around the halls, which you have to do to get some of the gas out of your system from the surgery - it helps A LOT.
I stayed in the hospital for two nights, which I think helped me quite a bit, and it helped my parents, who were trying to get ready for Christmas (they were not super pleased that I did the surgery a week before Christmas), and on the last day I had to go through the GI X-ray with the contrast. They said I had to do it to get out of the hospital, and damn them, I was FURIOUS they put me through this. Sure, I get why -they wanted to make sure there were no leaks in my new stomach and whatnot, but REALLY?! You have someone who just got most of their stomach cut off, is on pain meds, and nauseous, and you want them to swallow several cups of contrast? F that.
Needless to say, I did not do well with this test. I could only swallow just a bit, and then I was gagging, sputtering, coughing, and crying. It tasted awful, and my poor lacerated stomach felt like it was trying to implode from my dry heaving. I begged, I pleaded, I asked if there was any other way they could do this, and it was what it was. I finally...FINALLY managed to drink enough that they could see it on the machine and see that I didn't have any leaks. To this day, I have NO idea how I did it. None. Suffice it to say, that test was worse than even the pain I had to endure because I was the one that had to drink that awful stuff. Ugh. Awful. lol
A few hours later, I was released. Mom picked me up and we went and got my medications - pain meds, anti-nausea, a medication that kept my stomach from contracting, and a super strong antacid. I had to take these on a schedule, which was no easy feat with such a tiny stomach. And keep in mind, a shot glass was pretty much the upper limit of my fluid intake. I was still only drinking clear liquids, or eating the occasional popsicle. I went to my parents house and I slept there for hours until my dad came to get me and bring me home where he took care of me overnight. I was really moving around pretty much fine, and I will tell everyone this - the hardest part after surgery isnt' really the pain, it's the nausea. So, if you have the option to get the anti-nausea patch beforehand, DO IT. I will save your life.
I think this entry is long enough - more on days right after surgery in the next entry. :)
In love and light,
Jenn
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